ママ友は絶対に必要?ママ友づくりに悩んでいる方へ!どう声をかけてみるのがベスト?

子供が大きくなると、公園や支援センター・児童館などに連れていく機会も増えますよね。そこでママが気になるのが、ママ友という存在。昔から気が合う、仲のいい友達とは違って、子供が関わってくることなので、うまく喋れなかったらと身構えてしまうママもいるのではないでしょうか?ボスママなんていう言葉を聞くと、余計に怖気づいてしまいますよね。

今回は、ママ友を絶対につくって頑張らなきゃ!と思っているママに、どうやって声をかけてみるのがベストなのか、またママ友のいるメリットやデメリットもまとめてみました。

ママ友が欲しい!どう声をかける?

自分と気が合いそうと思ったママさんとは仲良くなりたいですよね。筆者も、素敵なママさんが児童館にいて、どうにか話しかけて仲良くなりたい!と思った経験があります。

まずは、どんなママさんにも挨拶をすることが大事です。そこで、相手も元気に挨拶を返してくれたら、それを見た子供同士も打ち解けてくれるような感じがしました。

初めは、少し勇気のいることかもしれませんが、「こんにちは。」と一声かけてみましょう。きっと相手も返事をしてくれて、話が弾み、とっても仲が良くなることもあるかもしれません。

筆者が仲良くなりたいと思ったママさんには、挨拶から話しかけて、子供の年齢を聞き、どこら辺に住んでいるのかを聞き、子育ての話や旦那の話で弾んだことがありました。好きな雰囲気のママさんとお話をするのは、とても楽しかったです。

そこから、何度か児童館で会うようになり、今ではメールもするほど仲が良くなりました。全員と仲良く、というのは無理がありますが、やっぱり仲良くなりたいなと思った人には、積極的にこちらから話しかけてみることをおすすめします。

ママ友がいる良い点・悪い点

ママ友がいて良い点と、これはちょっと…という悪い点を経験からまとめてみました。

良い点は

・子供の友達が増える

・悩みや愚痴を聞いてくれる人ができる

・子育てに関する情報を共有できる

といったところでしょうか。

ママ友は、「ママ同士」なのであって、普通の友達とは少し違うものだと思うのです。でも、だからこそ子供のことで悩んだ時や落ち込んだ時、共に励まし合えるのではないでしょうか。

反対に悪い点も考えてみました。

・頻回なランチなどがあると時間が拘束されてしまう

・ママ友同士のトラブルに巻き込まれる可能性もある

これらが絶対に起こるという訳ではないのですが、1人の時間が大切だというママがいたとすれば、頻繁にランチに誘われたら苦痛になってしまうでしょう。

筆者も、1人の時間は大事にしたいという考えを持っていますが、週に2・3回誘われた時は、ちょっとな…と思ってしまったことがありました。

また、「ママ友トラブル」というワードもあるように、自分が関係のないトラブルであっても、巻き込まれてしまうことがあるかもしれません。そういったことが起こるかも、と頭の片隅に入れておくことも大事だと思います。

無理に頑張りすぎないで

今回は、ママ友のあれこれについてまとめてみました。

結論をいうと、ママ友は無理につくらなくても大丈夫!しかし、時には子育ての悩みを共有できる、かけがえのない存在になってくれるかもしれません。焦らずに、自分から挨拶をする心がけを大事にしてみましょう。

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